Mx Wolfie 🐺 @wolfie@deadinsi.de

I just got a year older so time to update my #Introduction post!

I'm Wolfie, I'm 35, #British #bi #ace and #agender (she/her or they/them)

I've been on Mastodon since there was just .social and I was most recently seen on queer.party!

I also have a #Pokemon alt @Flareon and a #MtG alt @SkallaWolf
My fave things include:

#zoology
#wildlife
#Lucifer
#Hannibal
#TheGoodPlace
#Brooklyn99
#KillingEve
#Deadpool
#LGBTQIA
#AmyStudt 👩‍🎤 (ask me about her 3rd album out 4th October!)

Most likely to follow back if you're LGBTQ+ 🏳️‍🌈, British 🇬🇧 or really anyone who just seems cool 💜💜💜💜

We now have a snek frend in our household and isn't she adorable! She's an Albino Enchi morph Royal Python and about 2 years old. She's settling in to her new home at the moment

No name yet but we're thinking about it!

We were listening to Little Mix and my girlfriend said I'm the Little Mx

I think monster.pit went down soon after I copied my last queer.party backup there, but now queer.party is having a morning

*goes through all alts to find one that's up* morning all o/

and I didn't even notice the sapiosexuality definition in the middle, and a pansexuality definition but no bisexuality definition? Trash article "Medically reviewed by Janet Brito, Ph.D., LCSW, CST on January 15, 2020 " really??

Omg this article is awful from the start https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/327506.php#sexual-identities

"A person who identifies as asexual feels no sexual connection with any other people and has no desire to have sex"

Anybody can be anywhere on these spectrums, so a gay woman with a high libido might have very little sex. A sex worker may have a lot of sex but not be attracted to the people they have sex with, they might also have a low libido. And yes an asexual person could easily be having a lot of sex and have a high libido.

And the libido and action spectrums are the most changeable of the three, who you are attracted to can & does change but usually only from getting to know yourself and your attractions over time, libido can be affected by medication, illness, trauma etc, & obviously action requires consenting partners and all that.

So, a small fix for that graph would be to change asexual to hyposexual, the actual opposite of hypersexual, and adding an asexual-demisexual/grey ace-allosexual arrow.

But really it has so many other issues (non binary in the middle of male/female, kink being just BDSM and "sexual exploration") that it should probably be thrown out!

So this graph has been going around twitter and now mastodon (and even AVEN have RTd someone correcting the inclusion of asexuality) but I just wanted to write my own "why asexuality doesn't relate to libido" post! (there are also several other issues with the graph but this is very glaring)

This graph puts asexual on the Libido/Sexual drive spectrum, opposite to Hypersexual. This is incredibly wrong.

So, first of all, sexual attraction, sexual desire (libido) and sexual action are three separate spectrums.

Sexual attraction is who you are sexually attracted to - so for a bi person that could be people of any gender, a gay man is attracted to men etc

Sexual desire (libido) is how interested you are in having sex, regardless of who you are attracted to

Sexual action is how much you have sex, again regardless of who you are attracted to.

aw they broke the pattern with Mr Brightside

IKEA's hold music has ABBA every other track (I've so far heard Mamma Mia, Don't Stop Believin', Waterloo and now Radio Gaga)

I watched all 5 episodes of this yesterday, after hearing about it because Janelle Monáe did the narration and thinking that means it's probably going to be pretty inclusive.

And it was, they had lots of diverse people including an Asian-American dominatrix, a black expectant mother, gay people, mention of non binary people etc

There was a lot of cissexism in their discussion of biology and mechanics, but they did also talk about gay couples using surrogates and IVF etc.

But somehow in the episode about attraction, they completely forgot that asexuality is a thing? It starts from the premise that everyone experiences attraction and explains it from there, in a way that was inclusive of many sexualities except the ace spectrum which was disappointing.

And I didn't really learn anything I didn't already know but maybe younger people would and I'm not sure what age range it should be aimed at, it's an 18 on Netflix though so I guess adults only?

over here again, also made a new #picrew avatar for here

over here for a bit as queer.party is down