Shonalika @shonalika@deadinsi.de

so my first proper vlog is up! and it's about... #mastodon!

as ever comments on the actual video appreciated - and shares offsite too, so we can try and bring more people over ^^

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQwREOg0a9s

birdsong in the mornings is highly overrated. good old seagull screm. that's the way to go

🎵 if you wanna be my jumper
you gotta get with my pants 🎵

I'm like this with new clothes I can't wear them straight away, they have to mingle and get familiar with the other clothes before I can wear them on my actual body

this baffles the people around me but they're very accepting like; "ok. whenever you're ready"

I got new glasses last week, they are the exact same frame as my old ones. I'm still wearing the old ones

someone just said to me “I love you. but i’m very tired”

should I be concerned

*me, swatting flatmate's book to the floor*

your book's on the floor

asked; "do you still like me?" to the person I live with today

they were very taken aback like "what's WRONG with you???" and I'm just like heck I dunno. I feel like surely it'll wear off?

part of this feeling is likely informed by past relationships, but also I think by disability

it seems that it's likely to take a lot of time before I can trust that someone's interest or care will continue to outweigh the inconvenience of having to physically look after me

I remain very glad that people do, and I recognise I'm not always being totally rational. but the feeling's there nonetheless

gone back to ultra sun. I seem to be accompanied by some kind of sexy fire lizard

there’s so much I want to DO. I’m currently living with someone with a background in philosophy and English literature and they’ve got so many interesting books and I want to read tonnes of them. I also want to learn French cos I know shreds of it already and feel annoyed every time I half-understand something on Mastodon. And Hindi, because I know even fewer shreds of it already but it’s a language I should have been raised knowing, so not knowing it is the most frustrating thing.

Currently focusing on solo music and Powderpaint music and other collaborations and lefty video essays which I also want to do but that doesn’t leave much time or energy for much else esp with disability tiredness.

and also I guess my day job sometimes which I do not want to do but I do want the money

don’t really have a point here as such, just type-thinking. I hope I can eventually find a way to work some of the non-essential things into my downtime somehow cos it’d be nice

absolute cutest thing when you snuggle a person in bed and they let out little happy sounds in their sleep

so a couple people have been requesting that I set up some kind of a payment thing like patreon. earning from anything I do would obviously be super useful especially as I decrease my hours to spend more time on leftist vlogs and music videos and stuff that is generally at least less horribly corporate than my current day job

trouble is pateron just upped their cut and in any case I'm not sure which service to go for, or how to approach it in terms of "rewards," or whatever, like that feels... weird? or perhaps I just don't know how to approach it.

if you were supporting, what would you want? which service would you wanna use? would you be interested at all?

basically this is all new to me and any and all opinions would be good ty ~