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food 

i'm meeting a friend in the morning to get tamales and i'm fucking pumped

sex 

sending your boyfriend emails after he makes you cum three times

So, pending the Governors approval, it's looking highly likely that our last youth prison is closing! The funds will be allocated to community services instead. I'ma little pumped, guys.

Tennessee boosted

the list of men i would wax my pussy for is a blank page

food 

eat seven bowls of cereal, you cowards

i've got glorious news; My mother is not speaking to me

i desperately want a parasitic relationship with a local psychic

food 

i ate so many donuts. donut gang.

own the means of whatever you want, give me my fucking teeth

the worst crimes of capitalism: i should own my teeth

they couldn't give me my teeth because they're considered medical waste once they're ripped out of your head and it's like i grew that, dude, it's mine.

listen i know nobody gives a shit but stamps are fixing to go up so if you need stamps, buy some stamps. i need stamps. i'm buying them.

remember when i was an hour into Sweeney Todd and I went, "okay so when does he get the scissor hands?"

i haven't watched mad men or house of cards but i think if i watched either they'd be the same show

is it white people dreads or is it depression

being a class traitor by watching fridge organizing videos on youtube

I cannot sleep, hey why did we let A Day to Remember exist?

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